How to read between the lines in return-to-work conversations
What They Say vs. What They Mean
The most valuable information in return-to-work interviews often comes not from direct answers, but from hesitations, body language, and the things people don't quite say. Here's how to tune in.
"I'm fine now, but..."
The word "but" is your cue to lean in. What follows often reveals the real concern: ongoing symptoms, workplace anxiety, or fear of judgment from colleagues.
"It was just a bug" (said too quickly)
When someone rushes to minimise their absence, especially for stress-related time off, they may be testing whether it's safe to be honest. Respond with: "Sometimes these things can knock us sideways more than we expect."
"I suppose I can manage"
This isn't confidence—it's resignation. They're not ready but feel pressured to return. Explore what "managing" means and what support they need.
Non-Verbal Red Flags
The Shoulder Shrug
Often accompanies "I don't know" responses about fitness for work. It signals uncertainty they're reluctant to voice. Ask: "What would help you feel more confident about being back?"
Avoiding Eye Contact
May indicate shame or fear, perhaps around mental health stigma, or concerns around their ability to cope with workplace issues. Create psychological safety: "These conversations are confidential and we want to support you."
Fidgeting or Checking Phone
Could signal anxiety about the conversation itself, or eagerness to escape. Slow down, lower your voice, and emphasise that there's no rush.
The Power of Strategic Silence
When you ask "How are you feeling?" and get a brief answer, resist the urge to immediately move on. Count to five. Most people will fill the silence with more honest, detailed information.
Example:
Manager: "How are you feeling now?"
Employee: "Better, thanks."
[5-second pause]
Employee: "Well, I'm still getting tired quite easily, and I'm a bit worried about the backlog of work..."
Questions That Unlock Honesty
Instead of: "Are you fit for work?"
Try: "On a scale of 1-10, how ready do you feel to tackle your normal workload?"
Instead of: "Any problems with your absence?"
Try: "What was the hardest part about being off?"
Instead of: "Do you need any adjustments?"
Try: "If you could change one thing about your first week back, what would it be?"